Today, I am homesick. My failed blog attempts of the past few days (saved only as drafts...) suffered from daydream syndrome. I want to write about my adventures on boats, the ultimate chaos at the big markets, and my afternoon at the Royal Palace with Nouna, but I have other things on my mind today.
I'm really missing my life at UNK. Knowing what I'm supposed to do and say, being understood when I talk, and having some semblance of routine were things I took for granted last year. What I wouldn't give for a coffee date at Barista's or a morning shift at the WC!
Until today, I was not particularly homesick because I had no extra energy. Between dodging the traffic, handling sensory overload, and managing general disorientation, I couldn't even think about what I missed. Now, feeling ambitious/pretentious, I think I've become more acclimated to my smogged-out corner of Phnom Penh. I'm craving the open skies and clear air of Kearney.
But don't misunderstand me. Homesick doesn't mean I want to go home. On the contrary. I just arrived and I'm struggling to find my feet. Homesick means that I am away--living part of my dream--in a part of the world opposite my homeland. If I weren't homesick, what would that say about my home? The place I come from is worth missing.
Okay, enough with the whining. I'm off to live the life of a newly-graduated woman on a volunteer trip in Cambodia! Wish me luck!
Kearney, Nebraska misses you, too! I haven't been to Barista's at all...it just won't be the same! Homesickness is such a weird emotion. Is it happy? Is it sad? Nobody knows.
ReplyDeleteYou and Erik....8-)
ReplyDeleteMuch luck and enjoy!
Miss you muchly!
I'm not only one who misses you from Kearney! All of your friends that I saw at Bristas and other places on Campus asked me to tell you "hi" and are waiting to hear your wonderful stories that reflect your personality and great love of adventure! You are a half-away around the world from us yet our thoughts and sense of longing your company penetrate through the earth, reach China (because that's what we find when we dig the ground with a werid angle) and crawl down to Phnom Pehn. In short, we always think of you and wish you the best of everything!!! :)
ReplyDeleteI miss UNK and classes with you! I haven't found my routine or rhythm since graduation. Knowing you are in Cambodia with a purpose will give you peace of mind. I'm sure of it!
ReplyDeleteLove reading your posts! Love, Donna P